Kourtney's bookshelf: currently-reading

The Bermudez Triangle
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tagged: currently-reading

goodreads.com

...at times unbearably so

Kourtney: twenty, nerdfighter, cat lover, musician, book and movie enthusiast, tumblr addict.
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thepuppysizedelephant:

Ever find a pretty little lady at a bar, the type of look that screams of arm candy, the type of skin that longs to be unzipped, only to find out that she’s an empowered woman? Well, woow no longer, man friend! Just follow these simple steps to cure your feminist.

Step 1: win her over. Do this by pretending you care about women. Example: replace the word tits with the word equality and resume normal conversation. “I love equality. I wish that women didn’t have to hide their equality. I really wanna snort cocaine off of some drunk girl’s equality.”

Step 2: open her eyes. Girls are basically designed to be brainwashed, it’s how they became feminists in the first place, too many strong willed women in their past or something. Reverse this nasty little habit with subliminal messaging. Example: place a tube of lipstick in your medicine cabinet. She will soon feel inadequate to the woman you are presumably cheating on her with. This will convince her, nay force her, into acting like a more civilized, submissive girl.

Step 3: treat her right. Now, let’s not get crazy here, you don’t actually have to treat her right but if you buy her things while you quietly undermine her Ford Explorer and combat boots, she will start to think of this as positive reinforcement, like a dog. Soon, when you insult her, she will ask you to pick up the check.

Step 4: put her on a diet of cigarettes and hairspray until her waist is an apple core. Tell her she has never looked more ravishing.

Step 5: buy a trophy case. You will need a place to store her pelvic bone and the pre notch bed post.

Step 6: show her what you are capable of. Come home covered in another man’s blood, dragging a chunk of his muscle in your mouth, make her clean up the mess.

Step 7: build her a bomb shelter. Tell her the world is not wondering where she is, fashion a dog collar out of broken glass, lock her up like the good licker.

Step 8: give her a new name. First whisper it in the crook of her neck until her muscles have committed it to memory. Then shout it in the belly of her bedroom until the echo haunts her sleep. Finally scratch into her back while you fuck her, like branding your favorite ball gag. It is proof that nothing is sacred, that no backbone is too straight to be snapped into submission, that every layer of skin can be clawed of, nothing before this mattered. She never even existed without you.

(via constellant)

I just want to say that the How To Train Your Dragon 2 soundtrack is very good. I feel like it would be a struggle to write a soundtrack for a sequel, but John Powell did a really great job with keeping the old ideas while exanding on them and adding a few new ideas two. The complexity of the music grew up with the characters. 

Nerd rant over.

unchartedlust:

This Charming Man (Luis Leon Bootleg) - The Smiths

Ladies and gentlefolk, I would like to introduce you to your next go-to late-night tune. Let Morrissey’s charming voice melt your heart and surrender to the splendor of bootlegged electronica. Liberate yourself from thoughts of the past and wonderments of the future. Loose yourself in the beauty of the greatest sad British pop band to have ever graced this god-forsaken earth. I shall never grow weary of The Smiths. I can hear them in any iteration and still fall in love with them all over again. Their lyrics cut deep. They are subtle and rely on metaphors that linger long after the song stops playing. Luis Leon hits a homerun with this remix, he translates the original nihilism of the song into gorgeous tranquilizing electronica.

"Why pamper life’s complexity when the leather runs smooth on the passenger’s seat?"

hopefulcontestant:

How To Write A Hit Song as seen in Fine Tuned

(via wheezytumblr)

ngrmgmt:

Today I wanted to share with all of you the Mapping Our Madness workbook. This amazing zine’s goal is to be a tool to help you create your plan for when you are triggered, in an extreme state, experiencing crisis or are in a really terrible mood.

Mapping Our Madness is designed for you to fill out whatever way that you see fit, in order to help you!

(Even if this zine isn’t the right fit for you, I think it’s really a great one to take a look at. For me, I have used it as a brainstorming space for the last 6 months or so, but am planning to make my own me-specific workbook/worksheets and SOS plans pretty soon!)

To download, click here.

(via betterthandarkchocolate)

black-frostbite:

shubbabang:

I know I’m not the only one who does this but you know when you have this like boundary around you when you’re sitting at a table or a desk that only you are allowed to be in 

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And then someone or something that isn’t yours

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gets in that space

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and you just

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Holy fuck finally someone who understands

(via przeuszczski)

legalwifi:

please can someone create a transparent toaster so i can see how my toast is while its toasting 

(via date)

Atla Montaña ©

(via morning-revivals)

aestheticgoddess:

Untitled (with Black Dot), Damien Hirst 1988

(via muddafuggaz)